Love at First Sight!
I'm a hard person to get to know. I think it comes from being raised with a mentally disabled brother. I only pick "safe" friends, "loyal" friends and it takes me a long time to get close to people. That's why, so many years ago, when Colleen brought Diann Hunt with her to the Mount Hermon Writers' Conference, she was worried that I wouldn't accept Diann as "one of us". Now, I'm not cliquish -- I don't like anyone to feel left out and I will be nice to everyone. Really, you only know I love you when I'm mean to you. When I will say what I really think.
So when Diann moved into our room, no one was more surprised than me how INSTANTLY we hit it off. I loved her from the very start, trusted her immediately and most importantly, cracked up like a teenager with her. Part of the reason I'm so careful about who I "invest" in as friends, is that I'm an emotionally overloaded person. I feel other people's pain immensely, so I have to keep that crew to a minimum. And you know, if I knew that Diann was going to have MY luck, I might have rethought that. (Totally kidding!)
Isn't it amazing how sometimes you just have this great chemistry with people and can't explain it? I just listened to a Nobel Laureate in neurobiology talk about how the brain is largely a guessing machine and sometimes it makes mistakes, but it takes your memories stored up and binds them together in the hippocampus, so that you learn to make decisions based on what's worked before.
Now my best friend was raised with me. We've known each other since we were four and we were sort of mean girls at four. But we improved. But she is EXACTLY like me. I mean, I can't imagine what it's like for her to read my books because she has to know exactly what I'm going to say. The friends I've picked up along the way are nothing like me. So I wonder what it is in them that attracted me so naturally.
There are friends who last seasons in your life, and then there are those who endure through it all. And for me, that's been a love at first sight kind of meeting. How about you? Do you rely on your "feelings" to make friends? Is it natural or developed slowly over time?